This week is the inauguration of something new for Be Enough Me. We want Just.Be.Enough. to be a place of community, of shared voices, of shared empowerment and so will be rotating hosts for the Monday post. This week Stephanie shares her letter to her future self.
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Dear Stephanie:
Just stop. Whatever it is that’s happening, that you are doing, just stop. For two seconds and breathe. There is still so much life to live, things to do and see. But stop right now. Look around. You rushed through so much during your childhood, always scared and unhappy, hating yourself. You swirled though young adulthood quickly, seeking out those who would reinforce all the negative and squash the positive.
Somehow you survived in spite of yourself. More than that, you thrived. You finally found your path and found the right people to build your life with. You proved time and time again that you are a bit catlike. You may not always land on your feet right away, but you get there pretty quick.
The children’s years were too short. They say in childhood the days are long but the years are short and that proved true. You blink and they are all grown up. You did well. You were a good mother and, more important than that, you were the right mother for them. Even if some days they watched too much tv and ate too much ice cream, they were loved and they knew it. They never had cause to doubt that you were in their corner, loving them unconditionally. You were really good at knowing what the right thing for them was – as opposed to what was right for you – and acting accordingly.
So stop. Breathe. Whatever you’re up against now you can handle. You’ve handled everything else that’s come your way, even when the obstacles seemed insurmountable. You beat an eating disorder that almost beat you. You handled postpartum anxiety like a champ, refusing to be quiet about it. Whether it is a big challenge or you just view it as a big challenge, you can handle it. The advice your mother gave you still holds true:
Stand up straight, smile, maybe a little lip gloss, get out of your own way, and breathe.
Love,
Me.
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What about you? Do you need reminders to Just Stop?
We hope you will read, comment, link up,
and explore the stories of others that have linked.
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Next week’s prompt: What Fuels You?
(Remember you can also write on a topic of your choice.)
Also, congratulations to our weekend FB Be Enough Me spotlight posts.
Mama Track & Team Rasler.
Love this, Stephanie. Such a good reminder to stop and appreciate what we already have, what we’ve already accomplished.
Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted..To My Son
Stephanie, This is such a crucial reminder. I know that there are days where I do not remember to just stop and appreciate what is around me. Those are my longest days…the ones that I just keep plugging along, not giving myself the time to think, to be, to just smile.
This is such a perfect reminder for all of us. It’s so hard, in the busy world we live, to remember this. But you’re right–we have to just stop. To get off the merry-go-round, if just to get our bearings.
And thank you, ladies, again for the spotlight. It means so much to me.
Natalie @ Mama Track recently posted..My Fall Wish List
I often feel like I need it tattooed on my hand for the days when I just can’t seem to remember to stop…
Thank you for a great post.
LatteJunkie recently posted..Just be enough – a letter to my son.
What a great reminder to breathe it in. I like your point about being a perfect mother for your kids, TV and ice cream and all
Also, yes, my future self will need lip gloss, too.
Such a great letter from a future perpective. I actually need to write a letter to my past self.
Great photo, too! That’s a great angle to get both of you in.
Robin recently posted..The Story of the Magic Shirt
Yes, I need reminders to stop some days. Other days I need reminders to get going already and stop wasting time with detours that don’t get me to my goals. I definitely need to focus on the fact that I’m the right mother for these boys and stop spending so much time on parenting worry and guilt.
Thank you for this post and this site, and thank you so very much for today’s spotlight! Yesterday I was battling a Bad Attitude, but waking up to that started me off on the right foot today.
Jessica@Team Rasler recently posted..Team Rasler goes to Montessori
A beautiful reminder to just breathe.
Absolutely awesome post… thank you for sharing.
Darlene @ Life on The Franco Farm recently posted..Socialized or Sociable?
now that is a letter to yourself…one that doesn’t beat around the bush and doesn’t let you slink away from the bad stuff…it’s a letter that accepts yourself, good stuff/bad stuff/, and brings a mirror up in front of you to allow you the gift of truly looking at yourself. The reminder to “just stop” is brilliant and honest. We are so much more than the little things that we choose to keep looking at that “define” us.
I loved this so much.
Kir recently posted..Just Be Enough: Promises & Predictions
This brings tears to my eyes.
We think what we have to do is so important.
If we were told it would all be over next week, is what we’re doing so important?
just because others tell us it is?
JUST STOP.
And do what is there permanently, the memories with those we love, and those that love US.
Alexandra recently posted..Strong Start Day 2011- PostPartum Progress
I love the line, “You were a good mother, and more important than that, you were the right mother for them.” It helps to remember this truth on tough days. I think sometimes, as moms, we’re so hard on ourselves, unable to put into perspective all the great things we do for our children.
Jessica recently posted..A letter to my daughters
Beautiful! And great advice.
Jocelyn recently posted..Be Enough Me: A Letter
This is really good. The part about mothering really hits home with me.
Now if I could just get out of my own way….
(love that)
Elaine recently posted..The Sickies (also known as "us") – Miss Elaine-ous Monday
“Stand up straight, smile, maybe a little lip gloss, get out of your own way, and breathe.” Love it!!! What a strong woman you are!!! And isn’t it as simple and as hard as just stopping. I have learned the same thing. If I could just stop, pause and take everything in for a moment your perspective can often clear. It also allows me to take in the good that is happening all around me. I loved your letter Stephanie. It was beautiful. It will be a touching reminder to your future self and is a meaningful reminder to all of us on what to remember and remind ourselves of…just breathe! -Laverne
KindredAdventures recently posted..A Letter to My Girls
I ALWAYS have to remind myself to stop and breath. Always. If one forgets to breath, then one starts to suffocate… yet it is amazing how easy it is to forget this!
Life is much better after a deep breath – that’s for sure! What a great letter!
Kate Fineske (@katefineske) recently posted..Acknowledging a Career in Motherhood?
It’s funny. I tell my kids to “take a breath and just stop for a minute” all the time. But I often forget to take my own advice. Great reminder.
Missy | Literal Mom recently posted..The Literal Mom Facebook Page
Hey Stephanie – This is just so lovely. So true.
And you know what’s funny? It totally echoes a bunch of things I said in my post last week “Blink” (I’ll make that post my comment-love link below)
i guess great minds think alike. Love to you, my friend.
Varda (SquashedMom) recently posted..Blink
This rocks! Beautiful!
Elaine recently posted..Back from Kansas
I love this post. I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately in regards to my anger. I’ve never been an angry person or a fly off the handle kind, but lately it seems my patience has run completely thin. Beautiful post.
Stephanie- Beautiful post, beautiful sentiment. Yes, the ice cream and the tv are nothing compared to knowing that they are loved and wow- are you ever right- you can do anything- especially with lip gloss! (Love that line!)
Elena, you’re a rock star with the linky- thank you! Here’s the letter that I wrote. Thank you forever (and then some) for the idea!
http://theselittlewaves.com/blog/just-this-morning/
Galit Breen recently posted..Just This Morning