Creative. Snarky. Moody. Optimistic. I am many things.
Except for one. I am not a DIY mom. Sewing, stitching, crafting… I am good at none of those things.
Which would not be a problem except that my daughter, she is all DIY, all the time.
Last year, when she asked me if we could make a DIY Halloween witch costume, I thought I might be sick. But to humor her, and foster her creativity, I went along with it. I felt like I needed a passport to visit the fabric store, nevermind actually assist her with any of the work.
The good news is that she really does not want my help. She wants the resources that I can provide (ahem, my wallet) to provide the necessary supplies, but other than that…I am a useless decoration in whatever space she is using to craft her creations.
My hope was that after her DIY witch costume last year, she would be over the need make her own costume… But of course, I was wrong. She has been talking about potential costumes for months and months and finally decided this year on being a Mad Science Princess. What is a mad science princess? Good question. I have no idea. Other than a persona that lives inside her brain.
When it came time to start thinking about the actual costume, my DIY daughter designed three possible costumes. Yes, three. All different. As a family, we voted on the designs, and after that, she made a book to accompany the designs, to explain them in greater detail (if you have ever seen the Lego instruction books that accompany the kits…yes, just like those).
I knew I was in trouble again. More trips to the fabric store. More standing around feeling useless and inept.
The truth is that last year’s costume looked….well, let’s just say it would not have won any awards. But my daughter did not care. She was incredibly proud of her costume, that she designed, and that she created with her own hands. And whenever I say that I am not good at “that type of thing” my daughter rolls her eyes at me and reminds me of how I tell her that she can accomplish anything as long as she tries her best.
Which makes me realize something: Being enough as a DIY mom has nothing to do with being able to do the DIY myself. It has everything to do with fostering my daughter’s DIY abilities and experiences so that she can feel empowered to design and create anything she can dream up.
She does not need me to be good at making her costumes. She needs me to be good at encouraging her. She needs me to be good at fostering her creativity and passion for creating in general. She needs me not to judge or worry about how things look.
Maybe, just maybe… I am the perfect DIY mom.
xo
Elena
I remember the making of the witch costume. I think it’s amazing that Samantha has a vision in her head and does her best to make it come true. Letting her work through it is the best kind of DIY! There are times I have to remind myself to butt out when we’re crafting and to honor A’s process and product.
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Your daughter is awesome. I think a mad scientist princess sounds like the best costume ever!
I was forced into making a DIY costume for my son last year when he decided he wanted to be a *green* dog. (Where do these kids come up with this stuff?!) I didn’t think it came out that great but he loved it & still wears it a year later.
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Is she for hire? Her imagination is just what this uninspired mama needs. Mad Scientist Princess! I LOVE IT!
Children’s brains are amazing, aren’t they? I would have to say you’re pretty amazing too since you helped her develop into that little person.
HA! I am sure she would love to be hired!
From one non-DIY mom to another, that’s a wonderful way to look at it.
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