This magnet sits on our fridge. My husband got it for me, presumably because of all the times he had to listen to me complain about people at my old job who didn’t seem to be able to deal with the hard stuff.
Dealing with day-to-day stuff is all well and good. Challenging people to take things to the next level is great. But sometimes our job – whatever that may be – requires us to deal with the awkward stuff. To have hard conversations.
This is true if we’re mothers who need to have conversations with our kids about behavior. It’s true if we have a job outside the home that requires us to have good relationships with co-workers. And it’s definitely true if we’re executives who are paid way too much to avoid something because we don’t want (or don’t know how) to deal with it.
Being enough is not just about dealing with insecurities and the parts of ourselves we want to improve. It’s also about addressing the hard stuff too.
I’m working on this right now in a couple of areas – one family thing and one issue at work. How about you?
xo
Robin
It’s interesting. I think I take constructive criticism as a writer really well, but I get a little bit defensive about other areas of my life. I will have to get a magnet myself, I think
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I am defensive all the way around, I want to appear to be in a good place, that I have some of the answers that I don’t when OTHER people aren’t wearing their big girl panties…and I feel like I am. I normally don’t complain or if I do, I have a solution in place for it, even if that solution is denial.
I have that saying all over the place and it’s one of my favorites because it reminds me to GROW UP and deal with it, whatever it is.
what a thoughtful place to put me today..thank you.
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[...] Big Girl PantiesMay 23, 2012 By RobinI wrote about this for Just.Be.Enough today. Really.Come read! Share with Stumblers Tell a friendPin ItShare this:StumbleUponFacebookEmailFiled Under: [...]
Very true. But I often find it easier to deal with the hard stuff in other people than in myself. Of course my job kind of requires that skill set.
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This is a great reminder Robin. Standing up for ourselves is one thing, but confronting issues that are difficult is another.
I know this and am dealing with a very hard issue right now that I don’t want to.
Even people who appear strong willed sometimes face a person or an issue that they want to run away from, but that’s what makes us warriors; meeting the challenge head on.
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Can I borrow that picture next month?
The most important first step is recognizing you have things you need to work on. And then follow through. Actually, follow through might be the tough part for me.
Good luck.
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I am guilty of not putting on my big girl panties and running away from the tough conversations. Sigh. I hate confrontation. I know that it is beneficial, and conflict can be positive. It’s a blessing in disguise that my new job will involve having lots of tough conversations.
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My big girl panties have been missing for quite some time. I should probably do laundry. But I don’t wanna.
On a more serious note? Sometimes we have to suck it up and deal with things, but a lot of the time what we really need is to be compassionate with ourselves and find the middle way that solves the problem without making us feel like less than ourselves. I know that’s easier said than done, but I think that kindness is where it begins. We can beat ourselves up all we want, but it doesn’t solve the problem.
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