I went to Bloggy Boot Camp in Philly this past weekend. It was exciting and fun, informative and completely worth every penny. I love when women can come together in a big room like that and you know changes are happening all around you – you can feel the inspiration and support.
For most of my life I had a really rough time trusting women. It wasn’t until I was in my late 20s that I met women who felt like female soul mates to me; there was no competition or jealousy, just a complete and heartwarming love for each other. They taught me how to be a friend, even when I thought I had been doing a pretty good job of it alone.
So when I walked into that ballroom of so many great women I smiled BIG but went small, keeping myself in check and trying to not throw myself at others. In a way that screams of insecurity I decided to just let the day unfold and try to leave with a few new friends.
Here’s what happened instead.
I met INCREDIBLE women. I met women who would become friends of my heart within minutes of hearing their laugh, locking eyes with them and seeing our common stuff there, and I would get the humbling experience of seeing myself through their eyes.
I met women who actually thought it was a thrill to meet me.
“I got to meet @KirstenPiccini, somebody pinch me.”
Yeah, I know.
I would hug them and thank MY lucky stars that this sweet, funny, irreverent and completely adorable girl liked me enough to introduce herself and then my stomach would spin when I read a tweet that said, “@KirstenPiccini is just as sweet and wonderful as she is online.”
Well, who else would I be? I thought.
It simply never enters my mind to try to be anything other than the girl I show you online.
I am lazy.
I do love Law & Order.
I do wear three-inch heels every day.
I am always going to feel infertile.
Cupcakes are AWESOME.
Yes, yes, I do talk too much.
I cry daily, about everything from Hallmark commercials to the plight of hunger in our world.
And yes! I do care about you. I do. I hurt when you hurt, I laugh when you laugh. I have guilt and love and support in bunches for you.
I know that people could say, “She can’t possibly be that nice. No one is that nice!”
I don’t know if I am. I admit to being snarky and using really filthy language offline. I love off-color jokes and will do just about anything to make you giggle, but am I nice all the time? Nope. I’m human. Yet I know that when I left on Saturday, mixed with the hugs and tears I was crying at the thought of leaving my new friends there was also an overwhelming feeling of gratitude that these women saw me that way, that they thought I was someone worth knowing.
The truth?
It’s these women I am so lucky to know. It’s these women who showed me how to make a connection and make a friend. I honestly just hope they keep in touch and that they know that meeting them was the highlight of my weekend.
At this place in my life I find that being enough has become about letting go and allowing other people change your life for the better. Seeing myself through their eyes for just one day was enough to let me know that maybe the way I’m living my life is actually changing other people too.
Being the same ole me never felt so good.
Talk to me: Do you believe you are yourself onscreen and off? Would it ever occur you to be anything else? Have you met people who are one way online and another off screen?
xo
Kir








I think my heart is the same on-line and off, though (like you!) my language is perhaps a little more…off-color…And I am just thrilled for you that the experience was wonderful and just affirmed how valuable and wonderful you are!!
angela recently posted..In My Bag–Be Enough Me
I know for a fact, that you are exactly the same in both places (except for the off color language, which I love about you anyway!)
I hope that when I finally get to hug you, you know what a THRILL that will be for me…I’ll even tweet, “I got to meet @angelaamman, and she’s AH-MAZING!”
xo
Kir recently posted..Mama’s Going To Camp
Love this, Kir. So glad you got to attend! I’m the same, with maybe a shade more filter online in somethings and a shade more filter OFFline in others, if that makes sense. And I’m definitely ok with swearing filthily online and off.

Missy | Literal Mom recently posted..10 Must Haves to Be Enough
well yes, the filter online, I absolutely have one.
When we meet I’m sure we’ll get along just fine. In fact it makes me happy to know we will. 

Kir recently posted..Mama’s Going To Camp
I pretty much shed a tear each day too. You just made the ones for today! It was an amazing weekend and I really meant everything that I, personally, put on Twitter about meeting you. I already thought you were amazing but getting to know more of you only made it that much sweeter of an experience…dreamlike someone might say.
I feel honored to call you a friend now. I feel truly lucky to have laughed out loud with you. I feel happy knowing that we will remain friends!
Love you!! xoxo!
Kristen @ The Preppy Girl in Pink recently posted..Bloggy Bootcamp Philadelphia
I love knowing you are just as emotional as I am. Truly.
I meant everything I tweeted too…that my experience was even BETTER because I got the gift of your friendship in my “swag bag”. I loved our laughing, giggling sessions and I too am so glad that we found one another.
LOVE YOU too. xo
Kir recently posted..Mama’s Going To Camp
I love this and am so glad you attended! I think I’m a bit different in person as I’m painfully shy and people are not expecting that when they meet me.
tracy@sellabitmum recently posted..The 5 Stages of Planning a Disney Vacation
SHY? Really??? I don’t think I would have ever imagined that, I see you so confidant and outspoken, I would run up to you and squeal and hug you and you’d be standing there like “hey Kir, BACK OFF!!!” and I’d be mortified.
I promise to come up quietly to you and tell you that you don’t have to be SHY around me, I’ll make enough noise for both of us.

Kir recently posted..Mama’s Going To Camp
My dear Kir, I’m so glad you had a wonderful time. And who wouldn’t be thrilled to meet YOU?
I think I’m pretty much the same online and offline, though I keep my language cleaner on line

Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted..The Little Joys of Motherhood
seriously …are we all cursing machines in the Real World…I like that it’s our SHARED Dirty little secret. LOL
If I ever met you…I’d need to sit down and just take it all in…not miss a moment. You’re like a HERO of mine. xo
Kir recently posted..Mama’s Going To Camp
I can SO relate, to the trusting women part and the Bloggy Boot Camp connections. I went to the one in Baltimore a few years back and it changed the course of my blogging and writing. So glad you had a great time!
Abby recently posted..Ready for Drop-By Guests?
HI Abby…how are you darlin? I am so glad that going to this kind of conference changed your writing and life because I love both now. I really did have a great time..and thank you for coming over to say Hi..that means a whole lot to me.
Kir recently posted..Mama’s Going To Camp
I don’t think I ever asked myself if I was the same person online and off. I think I chat more readily online, and I definitely curse offline

Thanks for admitting you tear up every day. I didn’t used to want to cry as much as I have since I had Liam. It makes me think something must be wrong with me. Glad to know I’m not the only one!!!
SleeplessinSummerville recently posted..On Practicing Honesty in the Age of Provocative Magazine Covers
Oh I’ll admit to crying any old time, I am very emotional girl. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG with that
You are Not the only one.
the cursing again…I think we are all sailors off line

Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
I can relate to this, but it can be hard. With very few exceptions the people I let get truly close are the ones that seem it hurt me the most.
Corey Feldman recently posted..Psych visit and Mental Health Day
first, I’m sorry that the people that you let in hurt you, because that would make me close my heart too. I hope that the more you open up, the more people know how lucky they are to know you.
thank you for reading this and for commenting..giving me something to think about.
Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
It would be an absolute dream to meet you. I know in my heart one day it will happen. I would like to believe that I am exactly the same online and off. I have not, yet, met someone who isn’t, but I have heard how disappointing it can be when you meet someone and they are nothing like what they seemed. It is so sad. Why pretend you are someone else?
Jayme @Random Blogette recently posted..So I Wrote This Awesome Blog Post…
My dream too…to meet and hug you. You’re AMAZING to me. I agree, why try to be something or someone else, there is no real value in that. Honestly, I love when I meet someone and they are exactly the same way I thought they would be.
Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
It was so nice to meet you this weekend! It was incredible to be in that room with so many people supporting each other, many of whom haven’t met previously in real life. In essence, I think that I’m the same online and offline. But, I’m pretty shy in real life, especially in large group settings, so sometimes it may not come off that way until I’m in a smaller group or one-on-one.
Christine @ Love, Life, Surf recently posted..Why I should write for YOUR magazine
a true HIGHLIGHT of my weekend, meeting YOU. I just wish we had spent more time together, but now that I know you are in NYC , I will stalk you when we come to town next time. I promise.
shy translates, but honestly Christine , it was refreshing and in a group like ours…(See above) we weren’t going to let you get away with it for long.
You are just a really wonderful soul. 

Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
What an intriguing question to ponder! I think I’m generally the same person online and off. But in some ways, I actually think my online persona helps me be a better person offline. I have a tendency to become sort of whiny and negative and bitchy if left unchecked. Blogging helps me put things into perspective, see the hope in less than ideal situations, and utilize my internal filter. In short, my online persona grounds me.
That said, I’m still afraid my blogging friends won’t like the “real” me if they should ever meet me in person at a conference.
Glad you guys had a good time! Wish I could’ve been there!

Kristin @ What She Said recently posted..We Were So Stupid
Hi sweetie,
I can’t imagine you any different offline, I know you are authentic and true. I agree that Blogging and writing has made me a better offline person too…it’s so true that being part of a VILLAGE can give you perspective and make you responsible for your own”STUFF”.
what a great comment and exactly what i was thinking…that the person I want to be and show to the world MUST be the same person, for me to stay true and Sane.
I WILL LOVE YOU when I finally hug you girlfriend, no mistake about that.
xo
Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
You have written such an important post!! I’m different but the same online. I know that makes no sense but the people I’m friends with online are my supports, their my encouragement, and they get me. I feel safe telling them things that my real life friends might not get.
Immore authentic online.
Leighann recently posted..A Jewellery Give-Away!
HI you..First I am sorry that I haven’t been to visit you lately..I promise to spend the weekend catching up on your words. I miss you.
I actually know what you are trying to say, like Kristin said, sometimes the blogging helps us to “come clean” with things and to put our real selves out there first to make sure people SEE us and they can decide if we’re worth knowing.
I know with the infertility, I found a safe haven in the blogging, like you said the people in real life didn’t always GET IT, but that writing then (and NOW) helps me to articulate things better offline, point to people, situations etc and say “I’m NOT the only one…she feels that way too.” Giving credence to the emotions.
but I also know that if we met, because I know you ONLINE that you would be REAL with me, don’t be anyone else. I love you…love you…love you just the way you are. xoxo
-
Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
Im so glad you had a wonderful time and met friends whose words touched your heart. I am the same on and off line, I strive for authenticity and hope that others who have met me see that. Im glad to know some new facts about you (the three inch heels and your sailor vocabulary!!) and Im so excited to meet you this summer. *HUG*
Frelle recently posted..How Much Longer?
It was nice to see you in my TWITTER stream during the conference, although it would have been nice to hug you too!!!!! I know that you are REAL..realer than real and I love and respect that about you very much.
I can’t wait to meet you at BlogHer!!!! You have a hug waiting.
Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
I don’t like the idea about being one person online and another offline, that smacks of deceit and dishonesty to me, and personally I’d never do that but as other have said sometimes it’s actually easier to be more authentically yourself online, especially if you blog anonymously. What I really don’t like are people who are two-faced in real life. Or those are face whichever the wind of fashion or favour blows.

idiosyncratic eye recently posted..On Paper
HI you. Well I think that’s the point that we should strive to be authentic and real, behind the screen and on it. Writing gives me the chance to be the “other face” if I choose to, but in my life, i just want to be who I am…seems like too much confusion to try to be someone else.
I liked your comment, it’s perfect and shows me how AUTHENTIC you really are.
Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
You could be speaking for me in this post. I feel I am the same except maybe more goofy and colorful language in real life. I think you are great and I’m glad I met you.
Denise recently posted..Calm My Crazy: New Linky Starts Friday!
You could be speaking for me in this post. I feel I am the same except maybe more goofy and colorful language in real life. I think you are great and I’m glad I met you. Such a wonderful experience.
Denise recently posted..Calm My Crazy: New Linky Starts Friday!
HI Denise!!!! It was awesome to meet you…even if it was just for a small amount of time. That’s what i love about this anyway, that those small moments can really change you, inspire you, push you to open your heart to another new friend.
,,,,and the swearing again. My “SOUL SAILOR SISTERS”

Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
Isn’t it great to know that you can just be yourself and still feel good about it ? This post had captured that great feeling and more.
I had said this before and will say it again.
“The heart of every post is being real.” Thanks for simply being you !
sarah recently posted..Why I Ran for Intergity
what a TRULY BEAUTIFUL comment. I agree with all of it. I was so surprised that people wanted to meet me,…I am not just saying that, I am saying it because it floored me and humbled me, that these amazing women thought I was worth knowing when they are the superstars.
so thank you for seeing that here and for commenting. I am so glad this post is getting that kind of reaction.

Kir recently posted..WOE & Trifecta:Gathering Buttercups: Saturday Stroll
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